Jamie's Venture

I've Moved!

2004-11-28T02:27:00.000-05:00

I've moved! Please update your bookmarks,this page will automaticly redirect in 5 seconds, thanks to Wyckedone, my Internet pimp, he got me a hookup, and I switched to WordPress.

Buzzzzzzz

2004-11-28T02:26:00.000-05:00

In light of certain events that have taken place over the past couple weeks, I needed to get some release and frustration out...I found myself at my tattoo shop, and looky what I got added, this is a work in progress...

2004-11-27T23:34:00.000-05:00

Full back vies, glare is from the goop stuff. Eventually, it will be one piece

2004-11-27T23:31:00.000-05:00

Me and my hot tat artist Phil in the works

2004-11-27T23:23:00.000-05:00

Here she is bout 2 hours of work, and well worth it!!

Don't blow it...

2004-11-21T01:55:00.000-05:00

I've had 2 opportunities to hang out with the soldier, but, have kind of blown them off. Not really, but kinda...See, they hang out at this club that's pretty fucked up and in a very bad part of Dtown. But, 2 years ago, I would of been all for it, I lived for the clubs downtown. That's not the main reason, ecstasy. They all take quite a few pills, and well, I've never done 'em. Not saying I have to do them when I go out, but its, way way way too tempting. Because, I do want to experiment, but I'm fucking chicken I guess. I don't know, I'm split completely in half. I want to feel the euphoric feeling they get when popping that magical pill. I want to experiment with feeling every nerve in my body when touched. But at the same time, I fear of having a bad trip. I've only smoked marijuana, nothing more. I'm 21 and feel 40 it fucking sucks. I wrote him a text, we'll see what he says. I also know, If I get too attached, its going to be that much harder to say goodbye to the soldier. I did see him last night, it was nice. Very nice.
On the flip side, I also have court on Tuesday, hopefully all goes well. I want this to end so I can put it all behind me and move on. This is and could be make or break. I have already warned several of my doctors and attorney, that if she, the drunk driving bitch is there, I cannot guarantee them of my behavior. They all know this and that I am completely serious. It'd be worth it. She has no fucking clue what she has done to me.

Halo

2004-11-20T03:08:00.000-05:00

I re-registered my HaloScan account, cause bloggers comments suck. Enjoy.
Oh and I also updated many things on my side bar, added lots of new links, and will be devolping more of the site, and moving it to a host soon. Yippy.

Fuckin Holidayz

2004-11-19T13:25:00.000-05:00

**Warning Depressing Holiday post**
Over the last few years, I have come to hate the holidays anymore. I used to love Thanksgiving and Christmas. But, with really no 'family' to celebrate with, it makes the holidays boring and depressing. All I do is think about how much fun they used to be. Now, its just my mom and I. I just really wish my Dad would get his shit together and go sober. But, thats never gonna happen, I expect to be burying his ass within the next couple years. It sounds horrible, I know. But, it is the truth, he's just drinking himself to death and there is nothing me, my sister or mom can do about it. So I am forced to sit back and watch him dwindle to nothing. Breaks my fucking heart. My sister hasn't talked to any of us in I don't know how long. She is a whole other issue. Its been that way my whole life between us. We are 10 years apart, and never was really close. She is a pathological liar, and wasn't raised in the environment she is raising her kids now. I haven't seen my nieces or nephews in about 2 years. I miss them so much it hurts. Its not their fault, its unfortunate for them cause they have grandparents that are alive and have no relationship with them or me.
I guess its how I remember Christmas and Thanksgiving. Getting big Christmas tree's, decorating them and having lots of presents under the tree. Now, its like whats the point. Exspecailly now, where we live, there is no room for a nice tree, and there is no room for a "Thanksgiving Feast". Not to mention, we're afraid to turn the stove on, cause there is a valve broke and we can sometimes smell gas. There will be no turkey, mashed potatoes or bread. If anything, mom and I will go out to eat. In the previous years, we'd go over my Dad's house and play pretend family which I absolutely hate. But then, he gets too drunk and I just want to kill him. Crack! there goes another beer. I am living a double life, trapped in my own personal hell. The weather is taking toll on my and my moms bodies. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I also have to be in court 2 days before Thanksgiving, for my lawsuit. They are draggin me thru the mud. And, from the looks of it, I ain't getting shit. Michigan no-fault law sucks, and I have to deal with these problems the rest of my life. Just makes you sit back and wonder, is it all worth it?
The thing that hurts most, is hearing everyone else make their plans. What their having, all the people comming over, and then how much fun and good times it was. It hurts. I didn't ask to be put here, and so many times I wish I wasn't here at all. Ok, I gotta end this, tears are comming...

Your not going anywhere...

2004-11-15T09:08:00.000-05:00

So, I had a decent weekend. The best part would definatly be meeting this guy I met. Only its sad and happy at the same time. We started talking, he is being deployed to Iraq. 22 years old. I have a hard time comprehending that. And I'm sure he does as well. He's scared, and I would be too. Rewind. Lets start from the beginning. A good friend of mine calls me up, tells me to head over for a bit. Ok, so I head over there, its her, her boyfriend, and this guy sitting at the table, who I don't know. Small house so no real room or anything. Everyone's in pretty close quarters. We start bullshitting the usual. Well, this guy is sitting in between me and her. She introduces us, hi. No biggie. But then I take a second look, cause Im just thinking this is one of her freaky club friends. No this guy has a body that won't quit, a face chisled, handsome, shaved head mmm. So, I check him out a bit more, nod to my friend and mouth the words "he's a cutie". She agrees. Time passes, we all get more comfortable(smoke a few bowls)conversation gets pretty funny. He flashes me a card says this is what I do and its a Marine identification card. WTF, this guys a marine, and doing mind altering substances(not herb). And totally fucking cool as hell. And hott. He looked me dead in the eyes, said, "I'm being deployed to Iraq, for 2 year I just got my papers". I swear to fucking god I wanted to cry for him. All I keep thinking is why would this soldier be going over there. But thats a whole nother political debate for another day. So the rest of the night, entails some flirtatious looks, and some comments. I was druling, I asked my girl to goto the store with me. I said, dude he is fine. She agrees and knows this, tells me a little about him. The more I hear the more I like.
Next day, she calls me up and drops a few hints that he's on his way, and for me to stop by. No problem. So I head out. I get there, and he's already there. My back was all screwed up, hurting. I was telling my friend this and she's like "Jon's really good at backrubs, he'll get it out." I said, no I'm cool, she's like well, I'll ask him. He comes back upstairs, my friend tells him about my back and he is right on it. Cool. Very. Then he grabbed the chair for me to sit. Then he asked if i was comming with them, I said no. They were going to the club. They were getting ready to leave, so I left, got home and text'd my girl"I miss Jon's hands already". I get a reply from his phone"So, you miss me already???" Busted. Heh, but we've been talking ever since. I am going with them this weekend. But its really hard. I don't want to get too attached then have to say goodbye. 2 years is a long time in Iraq. Looks like I will be taking one for the country soon!! Vader, thats for you. I really dig him, though. Time will tell.

Just another brick in the wall...

2004-11-12T10:29:00.000-05:00

Daddy's gone across the ocean,

Leaving just a memory,

A snapshot in the family album.

Daddy, what else did you leave for me?

Daddy, whatcha leave behind for me?

All in all it was just a brick in the wall.

All in all it was just the bricks in the wall.

-Roger Waters, Pink Floyd

Keepin your computer safe!

2004-10-27T15:21:00.000-04:00

A few friends of mine in bloggerville, are having some general spyware/malware problems. Pop-ups, redirected pages, programs not running correctly etc. The following will detail how to protect yourselves from the nasties inside your computer. At the same time keep the nasties from getting in.
Ok children lets get started!
When it boils down to it, there are just a few *free* applications to help keep you protected.
Most all things come from just connecting to the internet and visiting a page, unprotected. Its like sex, if you have sex unprotected STD's usually follow. This is the way to put a condom on your PC.(That's just for you Jamie ;)
The problem is most people don't understand the difference between viruses, spyware, and malware. The following articles identify each:
Spyware
This is an intro to viruses, worms, and trojans
Malware
In my opinion, there are only a few essential programs needed to keep your PC clean and protected.
The most common problem I notice, using Internet Explorer. I totally understand why. Its default with any Windows operating system. Everyone knows what it is and thats your porthole to the internet. Sadly, that porthole, is just that full of holes, which in turn makes your PC susceptible to all kinds of different attacks. At the same time, these attacks are becoming more frequent, and harder to detect. They disguise themselves as somthing you would do normally. For instance, you visit you mail everyday right? Well, what if one day you visit your mail enter your username and password in, everything looks fine right? Wrong. You could actually be 'attacked' this way. You think you are going to one URL, and it looks like the right URL, (ie yahoo.com) but, in turn your user information is being reported to some kid far, far away. Happens everyday, the user is non the wiser. With IE, you are also very likely to encounter a browser hijack. This is a despicable trend that is becoming more and more common where the browser settings of web surfers are being forcibly hijacked by malicious web sites and software which modifies your default start and search pages. So, if you start up IE, and your homepage is set to www.google.com and you start up IE, and it goes to some porn site or something, chances are, you've been hijacked.
HijackThis! is a program created just for this issue. (If you need help with the log it produces email me)
Download HijackThis!
So, for starters, by using FireFox, a browser based on Netscape, eliminates alot of security issues that you would expierence with Internet Explorer(from here on IE means Internet Explorer)its also a smaller browser so it doesn't use up as much system resources. It also has lots of neat features to make browsing easy and clean.
Download Firefox here
Next on the list is simple spyware removal. I run it about twice a week, just to be on the safe side. This will detect and clean up any junk it may find. Download, install, update run it. Everytime you run it, update it.
Download Spybot Search&Destroy here
Another little utility, that catches other nasties that spybot may not find is AdAware. Another free utility.
Download AdAware Free Again, same rules apply, download, install, update run it. Everytime you run it, update it. This is a little more efficient scanner. I run this also about twice a week.
Another main and probably most important is a anti-virus. There are a few free ones out there, and they are just as good as Norton. I use AVG anti-virus. There is also TrendMicro, and Avast! antivirus that are also free. All three are good.
Download AVG here You have to register to get the license code sent to your email, but no biggie. Again, keep this updated, and run it every so often it will keep you protected.
One other essential you need is a firewall. Hard or soft it doesn't matter(well...yes it does...nevermind wrong subject)
For most users, a software firewall will do the basics to keep you 'hidden' from the bad guys on the Internet. A simple, free software firewall I have most users use, is ZoneAlarm. Like I said, it does the basics and is good for novice or beginner users. You can also turn on your firewall if you have WindowsXP(home or pro). If you goto network connections right click on the connection goto properties, then to the advanced tab. Check the box to turn the firewall on. This is a very basic and limited firewall, its built in so we didn't expect much of it.
Download ZoneAlarm Here Download, install and it just runs in the background keeping unwanted people out, and letting programs that need to access the internet in.

I know it can be overwhelming to some, how many precautions you need to take in order to keep your PC healthy and running right. But, hopefully these few tips can help keep your PC safe from the pop ups, and other wierd happenings. It could be happening right now and your none the wiser. These attacks are becomming very sophisticated and popping up more and more. Also, you may want to visit the link on my sidebar to blackviper.com his site is full of useful information on what you do and don't need on your operating system. If any of you have any questions, or need some help drop me a line, magikgrl(at)gmail(dot)com I'll be happy to help out.
Hope this helps, if anyone has a specific issue, not outlined in this post, email me ;) Happy surfing

2004-10-22T21:42:00.000-04:00

You know it

Mosh

2004-10-22T21:30:00.000-04:00

For the most part, I enjoy most all of Eminems music. He is a mastermind when it comes to getting real with lyrics. Thats why I don't think he should be critizices or censored for the ryhmes he puts out. Freedom of speech. I understand where he's from and his background, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying everything he's done is great just this new album comming up is going to be great. He gets pretty deep in it. The lyrics below, are a new song, Mosh. This album goes toward the political side. I really like it, if you can *cough* aquire the song, grab it up. (Send me mail, if you want it ;)

Eminem
Mosh

VERSE 1:
Scrutinize every word, memorize every line
I spit it once, refuel re-energize and rewind
I give sight to the blind, my insight through the mind
I exercise my right to express what I feel inside
Its just all in your mind, what you interpret it as
I say to fight you take it as I'mma whip someone's ass
If you don't understand don't even bother to ask
A father who has grown up with a fatherless past
Who has blown up now to rap phenomenon that has
Or atleast shows no difficulty multi-taskin
And juggling both, perhaps mastered his craft, slash
Entrepenaur, who has helped launch a few more rap acts
Who has had a few obstacles thrown his way through the last half
Of his careeer, typical manur, moving past that
Mister kiss his ass crack, hes a class act
Rubberband man, yeah, he just snaps back

(Chorus)

Come along, follow me, as I lead through the darkness
As I provide just enough spark that we need, to proceed
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength, come with me, and I won't, steer you wrong
Give your faith and your trust, as I guide us through the fog, to the light at the end of the tunnel
We gon fight, we gon charge, we gon stomp, we gon march through the swamp, we gon mosh through the marsh, take us right
through the doors
Come on

VERSE 2:

All the people up top, on the side and the middle, from the ghetto, lets all form and stomp just a little
Just let it gradually build, from the front to the back
All you can see is a sea of people, some white and some black
Don’t matter what color, all that matters is we're gathered together
To celebrate for the same cause, no matter the weather
If it rains, let it rain, yeah the wetter the better
They ain’t gon’ stop us, they cant, were stronger now more then ever
They tell us no we say yeah, they tell us stop we say go
Rebel with a rebel yell, raise hell, we gon let em? No
Stomp, push, shove, mush... Fuck Bush, until they bring our troops home
Come On

(Chorus)

Come along, follow me, as I lead through the darkness
As I provide just enough spark that we need, to proceed
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength, come with me, and I won't, steer you wrong
Give your faith and your trust, as I guide us through the fog, to the light at the end of the tunnel
We gon fight, we gon charge, we gon stomp, we gon march through the swamp, we gon mosh through the marsh, take us right
through the doors
Come on

VERSE 3:

Imagine it poorin, its rainin down on us, mosh pits outside the oval office
Someone’s tryin to tell us something, maybe this is god, just sayin we responsible
For this monster, this coward, that we have empowered
This is Bin Laden, look at his head noddin, how can we allow something like this, without pumpin our fists
Now, this is our, final hour
Let me, be the voice, in your strength and your choice, let me simplify the rhyme, just to implify the noise
Tryin to amplify to times it, and multiply it by six-teen million people are equal at this high pitch
Maybe we can reach alqueda through my speech, let the president answer our high anarchy
Strap him with a AK-47, let him go fight his own war, let him impress daddy that way
No more blood for oil, we got our own battles to fight on our own soil, no more psychological warfare to trick us to thinking that we ain’t loyal
If we don’t serve our own country, we’re patronizing our hero
Look in his eyes, its all lies, the stars and stripes, have been swiped, washed out and wiped,
And replaced with his own face, mosh now or die, if I get sniped tonight, you’ll know why, cuz I told you to fight

(Chorus)

Come along, follow me, as I lead through the darkness
As I provide just enough spark that we need, to proceed
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength, come with me, and I won't, steer you wrong
Give your faith and your trust, as I guide us through the fog, to the light at the end of the tunnel
We gon fight, we gon charge, we gon stomp, we gon march through the swamp, we gon mosh through the marsh, take us right
through the doors
Come on

I'm here

2004-10-07T18:20:00.000-04:00

Yeah, shit's been hectic. We've been real busy at work with the upcoming Exchange upgrade. Also putting out little fires, and trying to keep everyone happy all at the same time. Our environment is tricky the way it is set up and the locations. Plus, there have been cut-backs. Our VP was fired last week. In a very cruel way, but that is how the family is. They basically let him lead the managers meeting as normal, then called him in. Told him he was finished as soon as he gathered his things. Everyone was in shock, and confusion at the same time. I will really miss him. I already do, he's a really nice guy and that was my lunch buddy. In fact, he called me up today and I met him for lunch, its the first time I actually had a chance to talk to him. When they let someone go, they pretty much don't let them say goodbye or anything. So, non of us got to say goodbye. He had been with the company over a year, and due to the economy, cut-backs must be made. He was getting paid pretty good. So, that really sucked. But, I was glad I had a chance to talk to him today. It was just the manner they terminated him. Lead him on like everything was fine, and then call him in, it was a Wednesday, and say "Your dismissed". It's just how these people are. I dunno how they can do it, I mean, I understand buisness is buisness but they watched every move he made, then escorted him off the property. Its just strange to me I guess, because I have never had any expierence in an office environment. Especially family run and owned.

I have also have like 3 or 4 doctors appointments between this and last week, including the dentist. Man, have they come along way. I had a cavity as a child, but that was it. Until now that is, when the Pepsi caught up with me. All these new tools they use, plus at my dentist, they have you pick out a DVD to watch, so thats kinda cool. I picked out Fight Club. And, started laughing while she's got the torture tools in my mouth. But it was funny! I'm glad its Friday.

So, I went to the tattoo place today....

2004-09-25T23:44:00.000-04:00

And I got a new tat!! I love it and it is exactly what I wanted. I brought my camera along, so the other artist could get some action shots, check em out below!

2004-09-25T23:43:00.001-04:00

Finished Product!

2004-09-25T23:43:00.000-04:00

Shading it

2004-09-25T23:41:00.000-04:00

Bad azz

2004-09-25T23:40:00.000-04:00

Half way there!

2004-09-25T23:39:00.000-04:00

Just beginning the color

Offshored TechSupport

2004-09-22T18:07:00.000-04:00

So true

2004-09-17T14:10:00.000-04:00

No title, couldn't think of one. Just figured I haven't posted in a while, nor have I really had anytime between work and everything else. Still on the house hunt, this is a bitch. I found a house I really really really want. Perfect place perfect size, I think i'm crazy for even inquiring about it, but it is one of my old teachers from highschool, and her husband(both teachers). I remember when they bought the house, it was only a few years back. They are now building a brand new one. Probably just stayed there long enough to build up some equity. Its just jumping into this shit is not easy. I am a complete newb, and don't want to get ripped off. In case, its not getting ripped off, its just all the 'extras'. Meaning, closing costs, PMI, insurance, all that bs that comes after you sign the loan. Ol man winter is right around the corner, I can feel him all around, it won't be long before snow starts to fall again. I will not move in the winer again. No way. But, my lease is up at the end of October, and I am not signing another year with the bitch that owns the place. No way. Fuck. Grrr. And all of that. For a split second I think I can pull it off, then I put it into perspective, and grind the idea into the ground, bury it for a little while, then it comes back, and I think I can pull it off. What a fucking rollercoaster.

Today is my year in at work. I am proud of myself, yet feel I should be much more knowledgeable, and further along in life. It sure doesn't feel like a year. My boss has some medical test today, so I won't hear about a raise until Monday, which hopefully then I will be hearing something. Maybe that will help sway my decsion, I just don't want to get in over my head and end up with a forclosure or something. That is my fear.

We got the 'OK' on the Exchange 2003 upgrade. This is a major process in our environment. This will require a Saturday, which I don't mind at all. My boss said we'll be running together, as both of us have a learning curve as he would call it. I have a massive 200pge whitepaper on the Active Directory Connectore service. Because we are migrating from 5.5 to 2003. You can't just jump with AD in place and we have some kinks to work out with DNS before this will be succesful. We won't even be setting up a sandbox or test environment, we don't have the time or resources to build a couple server and mimick our environment. Just too much. I am actually excited, I love this stuff, and I get to do it twice, once for each company.
I'm glad it Friday, even though my weekends are and have been consumed with trying to find a place to live.

Oh and I will be posting on marijuana, very soon. There have been some new developments and I would like to share with the world my views on the subject.

Our US Government

2004-09-09T09:19:00.000-04:00

Nah, they'd NEVER lie to us! Thanks Chris P. for the linkage. You may have to give it a minute or so to load, but watch it.

2004-09-08T18:58:00.000-04:00

That, is a tempting paper

2004-09-08T18:57:00.000-04:00

Great

2004-09-08T18:55:00.000-04:00

my newest prized posession

2004-09-08T18:47:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I put this up

2004-09-08T18:45:00.000-04:00

Hailey, my dog

2004-09-08T18:44:00.000-04:00

Hailey Girl

2004-09-08T18:43:00.000-04:00

My puppy n me

2004-09-08T18:39:00.000-04:00

EDIT**I screwed up posting the pics, I thought this post would publish first. Any way, EBay is a bitch. That is all I have to say. They suck you in, keep you enticed. The more you are there, the more you find. So far, I have now acquired the things listed in the previous post, AND the very first issue of Hightimes. Along with 10 other vintage HighTimes from the 70's I just so happen to purchase from this fine gentlemen. Do they have an Ebay anonymous??? I bought a sweet digital camera from Best Buy over the weekend. I got a Gateway 4.0 Megapixel for $99 and a 256mb memory card for $59. I was a little leary about buying Gateway, but I figured for the price, eh what the hell. I must say I am impressed!! It takes awesome photos and has a bunch of different modes. I posted some pics above.
Either than that, work has been busy, we are looking to upgrade to Exchange 2003 soon, so we are trying to prep for that. Along with swapping out machines and upgrading everyone to XP, and we got a new LaserJet, for contracts, keeps me busy ;)

BigBambu

2004-09-02T10:24:00.000-04:00

<>I have been a long time, well, at least the last few years, collector
of Cheech and Chong memoribilia. I don't know what it is about those
two, but I love em. I have longed for a Cheech and Chong original
BigBambu album with the giant rolling paper. I scored big time. I got
one off ebay, bout $30 bucks, I just got it the other day, and it is
in excellent condition! For 30 years old, I was quite impressed, and
geeked at the same time. I have all kinds of Cheech and Chong stuff,
old and new. I like the older stuff better. I also collect comics,
Star Wars original comics. Which I have about 20 or so of the ones
from the 70's. As well as many action figures. I collected baseball
cards when I was a kid, I had a massive collection. When I collect,
its usually something I focus on, then let it go for a while then pick
back up on it. I eventually want a wall, well not a whole wall, but a
portion, with CPU's, old to new. Damn, I am a geek, Kick ass. I
wouldn't want it any other way.
At my job is usually where I am happiest. People see me here, they
have no idea what I am really like, and it kinda sucks, because it
feels like you are living a double life, but I have to. Like when my
truck was broke into, I went into one of my impulse rages. Like
blacking out almost, because I have no control over it. And when I was
discussing this with a co-worker over lunch, he says, "Thats not you
at all". But thats just it, it is me. And they don't ever see that
side, mostly because I am happy at work, becuase I love what I do, I
work for a great company, and when I am here, it takes my mind off a
few things. Not all because there is always worries, thoughts, and
depression still there. Hits like a ton of bricks when I walk outside
the door. Its fucked up really, most people hate thier job, and can't
wait to get home, its just the oppisite for me. These things are all
attributed to my accident, with the head injury I sustained, chemicals
changed in my brain. I deal, I cope, I do the very best I can and have
pushed myself very, very hard to get where I am at. I don't plan on
stopping now. But, everyday when I get up in the morning for work, I
look at the scar through my eyebrow, and it fucks with me, it hurts
because if that scar wasn't there, I would not be having or had the
issues I deal with now. The accident occured 1/28/2001, my senior
year. I graduated in June, and started college two weeks later, failed
a math course, had to do double work, plus worked two full time jobs
in between. Then graduated college, almost with honors, two years
later with my degree. Since then I don't have any motivation to go back because I know how hard it was to get that far. Im sure once I get through a few issues, I will be going back, but right now, my degree plus my work expierence is shining on my resume.

Oh, any you guys seen that new show out? Dog the Bounty Hunter? It
kicks ass, I watched it last night, I dig that kind of shit. I really
believe I would be in law enforcement right now, if it wasn't for
physical restrictions. Oh well, maybe someday. But check it out, its
some funny shit.

Days, nights, and the like

2004-08-27T13:01:00.000-04:00

I've missed you dear blog, I've just been busy as hell, and I don't know where to start.
Well, I did have the depistions, it was probably the strangest thing I have ever been through. To actually be in the middle. When I came in, my attorney had me put a Stridex pad on my scar, all the while i'm thinking to myself, why the fuck are they making me hold this thing on my head. Until I found out, it makes the scar show up better for the defense side. Cool, good tactics. They wouldn't let me go outside to smoke cause the court reporter was already there, and they brought in a photographer to take pictures of my scar. Just crazy shit, the defense attorney was a woman, that didn't have a clue about my case. It went rather quick, and I'm dealing up against the worst insurance company to get money out of. They changed the laws for everything regaurding no-fault, and personal protection so it makes it near impossible to sue. Its total bullshit because this drunk bitch decided to drink and drive one night, I am fucked for life. Fucked with shit I never had before and don't want to deal with the rest of my life. So, I won't find anything out for probably a month or so, because they need to gather all thier information. Whatever.
I really, really dig my new look, it fits me, and I needed a change. Thanks again DarkFusion, please check out his work, great artist, and I am in debt to him for throwing this up for me, not too bad for a first time eh? Only thing I need to get back is HaloScan, I will fix that over the weekend.
Boss is gone for the rest of the day, I have a few odds and ends to do to finish off the week. We just got that PC back from the remote location that was attacked with a fire extinguisher, I knew it would be bad but jeez, I had shit all over my office yesterday, I used two cans of air. I just started it up, and its got a humming going on, so I need to go back over it and take the heat sink off this time, I think thats where its comming from.
Well, I have to get to work or something, I will update more later, lots in my head

Facelift

2004-08-20T08:04:00.000-04:00

Thanks to DarkFusion, I have a new template, we are toying with some ideas so I don't know how long this one will be around, but I dig it. DarkFusion is a kick ass artist his webpage is here. And he also has a deviant page.
Check him out, definatly worth it.

And then it was gone

2004-08-18T09:46:00.000-04:00

So 5 0clock rolls around, its time to get off work, my boss and I are leaving the building, headed towards our cars. I see a few co-workers standing around my truck, as I extend my neck to look over the other cars, I see I have no drivers side window. MOTHERFUCKER. Upon closer examination, someone came by blew my whole window out, and stole my fucking wallet. I lost it when I seen my wallet was gone. I have everything in there, all my credit cards and ID, and social security card. Its not like my wallet was in plain view either, you would actually have to look inside, and around, its down below my ashtray in a compartment where I had other misc. shit. I had a doctors appointment I had to goto, then I got home and started calling all the credit places. They had already tried to withdrawl $100 4 times but were unsuccesful in thier attempts since they didn't have my pin. Thank god I left my bank card at home. That would be the one I was most concerned with. But still, if I don't have enough already going on, I come out from work and find my window on the pavement and my shit gone.
And, I just went downstairs to the garage, they heard an alarm going off, ok, why the fuck didn't anyone say anything??? I didn't think my alarm would go off if the window was broke, which it doesn't. So now I'm thinking, why did they hear it and when I got to my car, I opened the door from the inside, and it went off. I called the dealership to see what exactly my alarm does, lo and behold if its tripped, it will go off for 110 seconds and reset itself. Meaning it went off for 2 minutes and reset. Nice.
I was up till 2:30 this morning calling credit card companies, reporting stolen. My sister called last night for the first time in a LONG time. So that was wierd all in its own way.

A whack back in time

2004-08-17T09:54:00.000-04:00

In light of recent events, as well as reading some other great blogs, I thought its about time to dabble in my childhood(or what I can remember) for a bit.
I remember being very young and Mom and Dad both worked full time, getting raised by my older sister or a babysitter. My sister, we are 10 years apart, and it shows. I don't think we've ever really been close siblings, not to say that I never wanted to, just didn't happen. I remember when I was young, and my sister in her teen rebelling days, would do anything to cause friction in the house, she never stayed in school, and dropped out in 9th grade, after repeating it 3 times. I can remember my mom taking me to go look for her stupid ass, hiding out at friends houses'. Or over her boyfriends house. By the time she was 16 or so, she was out completely, and never came back. She stayed here and there, anywhere really, hooked up with a few guys and this last one, she became pregnant 3 times, now I have 3 awsome nieces and a nephew. She's never worked, never went to college, let alone finish highschool, we are like day and night. All the while, my dad, slowly turning into the drunk he is today. My childhood memory is very spotty, I think it was from my head injury, because it seems like I knew alot more before.
Anyway, mom was around all the time, when I needed her, she was there. To take me to school, doctor, friends, the pool, she was there. She put up with alot of shit I seen over the years growing up as the youngest. The reason why my sister and I are 10yrs apart, my mom miscarried 7 times between us, doctors told her she couldn't carry boys, then came her girl, me. On top of all that, I remember her having cancer, for a short time, I was young, so I don't know much of the details. She put up with my dad's drunkeness for such a long time. That is one of the reasons i am not much a drinker. I can vaguely remember a time when my dad didn't drink, but brief. Every other memory after that, is them fighting, over the stupidest shit. I hated it, I can remember so many times hiding out in my bedroom, hoping to god my dad wouldn't snap and kill us all. A few times I had that fear, he used to be a very violent drunk, break shit, throw it, cussing at everything. I did't know what to expect when they faught. When I went to a friends house it was a relief, I didn't have to hear it, I could be around a normal family, no fighting, no swearing, wholesome leave it to beaver family. I yearned for that so bad, I did lots of things to get them to get along. Well, it never really worked, unfortunatly. They were hot one day and cold the next. Then it just got to the point where I was walking on eggshells, I couldn't take it. I was around 13 or so, and thats when the pictures became clearer on what was going on and how often it was. As well as how miserable I was, trying to goto a new school, make friends, can't have anyone over, cause I don't know what will happen. About 5 years ago, they got into it, he came home drunk, I was at work, and I told my mom, this is the last time he leaves, he's not comming back and if he does, im out. He hasn't been back since. In and out so many times over my life, I can't even keep track of, he made little effort to see me when he was gone. We were evicted from many nice homes due to him not paying the rent, which resulted in me being shuffled around from school to school. 9 schools in all. He'd leave with a garbage bag of clothes and his van. Ha, that was another thing, the motherfucker hasn't had his license since '86 and hasn't paid any taxes, no social security, no 401k, no retirement fund. He is still like this. Doesn't see the importance in it. Whatever asshole, when you realize your liver is shot, and can't work under the table anymore, he'll realize. 3 drunk drivings in 10 years will cause you to loose your liscense. The more I even type about him it pisses me off. Don't get me wrong, even though he is a drunk, he still gets up and goes to work every day. Makes hardly any money, working carpentry under his drunk boss, that picks him up, goto 1 or 2 jobs and done by noon. Lives in a one bedroom apartment, that he is content with. And he wonders why I don't come see him. This sounds so fucked up now that I see it on paper, but I realize we all have our own little dysfunctional family.

Change...change...change

2004-08-14T00:33:00.000-04:00

I have so many things going on right now, I don't know where to begin. Our lease is up in October, and we don't know where we are going to go. I am trying to buy a house, I've been searching and searching. Something needs to break. I dunno, my brain is going faster than I can type. I just have so many things comming in all at once. We go for depistions on Aug. 25th for my lawsuit, I am so nervous, I just want things to be over with. My mom who I am so worried about, needs to go into the hospital, they don't know whts going on, and she is to her breaking point, she needs a rest, there are so many things going on and time is just flying. She was hurt on her job in 97 and her health has taken a severe plunge. Its scarry, I have no family or friends really to turn to, it's all up to me. I am the only one here for her, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love my mom dearly she is my bestfriend. We have stuck by each others side the whole way through, that is the one think I am thankful for, the most loving, caring mother you could ask for. But it just things seem to be crumbling for me and fast. I am becoming scared. I know I can do this, just so many things to put into perspective. I just don't know what to say, and I'm about to cry, so before my keyboard ends up wet, i am ending this post now. I will post more tomorrow
~Magik

Hmm

2004-08-12T11:23:00.000-04:00

They say I'm an engineer, I don't know how accurate that is, but the site is good.

ISTP - "Engineer". Values freedom of action and following interests and impulses. Independent, concise in speech, master of tools. 5.4% of total population.

Take Free Myers-Briggs Personality Test

Introverted (I) 51.35% Extroverted (E) 48.65%
Sensing (S) 54.05% Intuitive (N) 45.95%
Thinking (T) 52.63% Feeling (F) 47.37%
Perceiving (P) 60.53% Judging (J) 39.47%

Another damn quiz

2004-08-11T22:32:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Jay, here's my results:
The Intern
Deliberate Gentle Sex Dreamer (DGSDf)

Capable. Trustworthy. Carnal. The Intern.

From our experience, Interns are nice girls who would really, really like us to come on to them. They, like you, must be looking for sex, preferably from someone good-looking and successful. So... what are you doing later? Oh, okay, cool. Well, maybe next time? Okay, okay, jeez.

The thing is, you're a little bit quiet, so men think you're waiting for them to start things. You do like sex a lot, they're right about that, but few of them realize you're a genuinely thoughful person.

You're choosy, not wanting to get mixed up with just anyone. Girls can get away with this kind of selectiveness for some reason. Most guys have to take whatever's lying around, passed out.

You're not necessarily looking for a steady relationship right now; that's cool. Be careful to avoid people trying to tie you down to anything
Pretty accurate, I must say
http://www.okcupid.com/oktest

Crazyness

2004-08-06T13:39:00.000-04:00

This week has also been extremely busy. I had a day-long doctors appointment the other day. It was required by my insurance company, so they will keep paying my medical. Its basically just a long ass test, that tests you on your skills, memory, motor, logic etc. Well, this is the 3rd one, the first two were necessary, for my lawsuit, and this one was just to make my insurance company happy. I have to go through alot of unneccesary bullshit due to this accident, I can't help but think, if we would of taken a different way home that night, I wouldn't be sitting here(dr.'s, lawyers, pysical therapy, etc.) Very tiring. Not to mention frustrating, expecially these tests I think the technical name is 'neuropsycologial exam', I think. When I go through these tests, I can see myself fault, it is very frustrating and depressing. Cause this is shit I should be able to do, no problems, well, it is a problem for me. And everytime I get results, its basically the same, mild brain damage, memory problems, certain logic, and math. Fucking bitch, please, don't drive drunk.
On other notes, we have been doing lots of little projects at work. We are implementing a antivirus gateway, so we have 3 layers of email protection, since that is where most viruses are comming from now, we also upgraded our antivirus version, we use Norton Enterprise, I like version 9, easy to deploy and maintain. When rolling out the client updates, I just drag and drop em and Symantec does the rest. Only ones I have to do individually is the 98 machines, which there isn't many left in my building, maybe 5. Soon we will have all of them on XP Pro, just some are harder to upgrade then others due to the older applications we run, and have to keep running. I have now been here almost a year, I am very proud of myself and I must say, I plan on sticking around, I have no complaints.
I am totally kicking back today, boss is gone, his uncle passed. He's not one for funerals so he came in this morning for alittle bit, then went to the other building and went home. I feel stupid becuase I couldn't get this NT4 box to connect to the net, or to our network or get it to recognize the damn cdrom. I was getting pissed and I asked my boss on a few settings, everything seemed ok, he said we would look at it Monday, I just wanted to get it done for him, it was a simple task, and I can't get the damn thing to work. Frustrating.
I don't know if I talked about this or not, I think I did, on a post a while back. But, anyway I went to college with this girl, she lived close to me, and since school was a hour away, we became commuting buddies. And with that came a friendship. We took the same course in college so we were in all the same classes. She's a cool girl, nice, friendly pretty funny, we had some good times. She was a big girl, I mean pretty damn big. So, halfway through school year, one day she informs me she is having that bariatric surgery done. I thought to myself, ok, but you could loose the wieght yourself. So, she gets the surgery done, and losses weight, alot of wieght, and her personallity changed dramatically. She wanted attention, and all she could get, and she was now getting it as she was loosing more and more wieght. Ok cool whatever. I'm happy for her and all, its just you got to know her to know what i'm talking about. So, we finish college, and 4 months later I scored this job, she was jealous and pissed. In fact, when we graduated, she swore up and down she would get a better job faster becuase she graduated with honors, I knew better. I know most employers could give a flying fuck less what your grades were. So then this guy she knows from high school comes home from the Army. They hook up, funny he wouldn't hook up with her when she had the pounds, but thats not really the point. Its all a downward spiral from there. Things no longer revolved around her wieght, but around him. Everytime I would talk to her, all I would hear about was him and what he said and blah blah blah. Then she decides she is moving with him back to Virgina. But before he came along, she was going to go back to school and pursue her career. I can't tell you how many times she would say how she was making a career for herself to be stable and independant, then get married. Well, in June, she moved there with him and she married him July 2nd. She's been with him maybe 3 months, and most of those 3 months, he was in another state. Now, they are back here to have a ceremony. She told me they had no reason to wait, I'm thinking to myself, you had every reason to wait, and no reason to actually get married. I don't know, maybe its just me. I'm totally happy for her and all, but why rush things? Its ALOT harder to reverse a peice of paper than it is just to walk away if something was to happen. She didn't even give it a chance at all. She just got married, i'm pretty sure I will be hearing of divorce not to long from now. Or I could be wrong and they could live happily ever after. Like I said you gotta know this girl to know what I mean. Her parents have paid for everything all the way through life and at barely 21 she marries this guy to take care of her. That is the way I am seeing it. Crazyness, glad its not me.
Speakin of guys, I am talkin to one, and I think we were together in another lifetime, cause we are so much alike its scary. Its a male version of me! I dig him lots, he's very smart, knows what he wants and is a really nice guy. Hopefully, things go all good, I am probably going to see him next weekend :) Fun times.
Today is Friday, and I am glad, I have had a hectic week, with work and dr.'s. Last weekend was busy, we had to clean out a van with a bunch of old shit, and the van had been sitting for like 2 years. It doesn't run, the engine is gone. But, its finally going to the scrap yard, so we had to get the shit out of it before we take it. Thats the scariest thing i've done in a long time. I have a phobia, of bees, wasps, buzzing scared straight. If that is one thing that will make me run, and run fast its bees. I am terrified of them, I have always been that way. We open the fucking door and there is two fucking nests, I freaked!! Even typing this is creeping me out becuase i'm thinking about it. They are flying around and shit, I ran across the street. If there is one thing I can't handle its bees. Ok must stop talking about them. Change subject.
I am getting into webdesign a littlebit, I have obtained a copy of DreamweaverMX04 and FlashMX and Fireworks which is sweet. Dreamweaver is pretty easy once you get used to it, the shit is all drag and drop and the code, you can just pick it out, I don't think they could of made it easier. Thats all I can think of now, I may post later, or not

Funkin' Friday

2004-07-30T09:16:00.000-04:00

Hey guys, i've been busy so I haven't really had time to update. We went to the other location 3hrs away and cleaned all the shit out. There wasn't really much to begin with. Just a few little tables, some chairs, papers, and the computer. My boss likes this kind of thing once and a while, it gets us out of the office all day since it is 3hrs there and 3hrs back, so that trip takes the day. And we only work for an hour or so. We got out there, and it is in BFE, take everything apart load it up and wait on the cable company to get there, they didn't come and we had to go so we gave the modem to the people next door. The thing I liked about all this, I gotta brand new, leather executive chair. I was stoked about that. Much more comfy than the one out of the 70's was.
I met with my attorney the other day, he informed me that we are going up against the worst defense attorney who just doesn't give a shit about anyone. Great. Also, they changed some kind of no fault rule or something. Which also doesn't go in my favor. The law is real messed up, in the end we know we will come out ahead, cause facts are facts, but he was giving me heads up on that, because every detail is important. I can tell already this is going to be one hell of a rollercoaster ride.
Today I am putting together a antivirus gateway, doing some maintanence, but nothing major. Boss is gone all day today, so it's a laid back day. I want to get my tat done this weekend, if I do, I will post pics, I will have someone there to take action shots too.

Tarot

2004-07-27T22:56:00.000-04:00

I always liked tarot and things of the like, and thanks to the other Jamie, I took this quiz(funny, I got the same result as her):

You are the Justice card. Justice preserves the
harmony of the world. Working with opposite
forces, Justice does not seek to criticize or
condemn but rather to accept. The idea behind
the card justice is that opposite forces are
complementary; you could not have good without
evil or light without darkness. Justice's
position is to make sure that if a thing is out
of balance, the weight of its energy is
realigned with its opposite force. This card is
also a card of humour, for it is in pointing
out contrary positions that humour is often
found. The attitude that is found in the
humourous person, being able to shift
perspective and flow with an instinct, is
important in the maintenance of good balance.
Image from The Blue Moon Tarot Deck.
http://www.themysticeye.com/pics/bluemoon.htm

Which Tarot Card Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

La ti fuckin da

2004-07-26T13:23:00.000-04:00

Wow, why is it when you need to get ahold of someone, you can never reach them, but when they need to get ahold of you, they find everyway possible to find you? Boggles my mind.

The head manager of x department and I went to lunch on Friday. Mainly to discuss the recent events, with the girl getting fired and all. So we are shooting the shit, waiting for our burgers, and he's trying to figure a way to cut costs. So I told him well, you just got rid of her, why does she need an office? You see, since its a remote location, all we need is a computer and fax/copier that location wasn't bringing in any money and we were renting a office trailor. I told him, get the trailor out, disconnect the modem, propane, phone and we can use the office next door to fax contracts to. Well, he thought it was brilliant, needless to say, we have to drive across the state again, to pick up the computer equipment.
Today I get a phone call from one of the owners, he says that someone tried to break in a different branch. They failed at the attempt, but didn't fail to make a mess. They broke every window and sprayed fire extingushers in the building. Nice, white powder all over the place, printers computers everything. We will deal with it tomorrow, if its that bad. Damn kids.
I'm really starting to think somethings up with the seasons, we've had cold weather for July. It was under 50 the other night, and didn't even get to 70 yesterday. Eh, it could just be Michigan. Oh, I highly recommend checking out this site, kick ass art and a real hot French guy.
Happy Monday

Pack ur shit and leave

2004-07-21T11:32:00.000-04:00

A few posts back I was talking of that user we had, that was in hot water over not showing up etc. Well, I just got a call from management, saying they let her go. Its about time, the rest of us don't get paid for the time we aren't here, niether should she. This was a really, really dumb thing for her to do. She's 23, no college degree, and the area that branch is in, there is virually no jobs. She fucked it up big time, getting paid nice, plus commision, benefits all that jazz, and just decides when she's gonna show up, take 2 hr lunches, I would feel like an ass. So as I type, she is getting her stuff together, and management told me they would call when she was gone so I can lock her account, and do some investigation to see if anything was taken, anything is possible. I kinda feel bad because I had a hand in this but, she had her chance and blew it big time. Its actually a load off because I don't have to worry about tracking her moves, and relaying to who ever that so and so isn't doing this or isn't there.

Neat

2004-07-20T10:00:00.000-04:00

Terminal Island is a cool blog I found

Updates, Updates

2004-07-19T14:18:00.000-04:00

Back to work, i've been on the couch the whole weekend. My jaw has been killing me, I think its the rest of my teeth shifting back since they have room now. Today its feeling much better, I stayed doped up this weekend, but it only helped so much. I smoke, and I wanted to smoke, thank god I didn't get dry socket. So yeah, feelin a lil better today, hopefully as the week goes on they will be totally healed.
I deployed the SUS, and so far it looks like I did it right. I'm not an active directory wiz yet, so I sometimes get lost makin policies. I need to work on it more. Actually, there have been lots of things I feel I should know. I guess I am just second-guessing myself. But I really do feel like I should be smarter. That is so frustrating.
The thing that kinda sucks about being an admin, is that when we have problems with other employee's, it comes down to me to check thier logs, see what they have been doing at work, see if they are even at work, and it comes down to someone loosing thier job. We have a employee, at a remote location that turns in 40hrs a week, but apparently isn't there no where near 40hrs a week. So then it comes to me, put a logger on the pc, track when they log on and off, and what they are doing. I hate it but I like it. When I first started here, I had to do some updates on a client at a remote location, I remote desktop to it, and Kazza comes up, great, using illegal P2P at work. So boss says search for all mp3's and delete, well, when I searched for them, I seen some things comming up in the my pictures directory, I go check things out and yep, he's a porn freak. By the end of the week, he no longer worked for us. How fucking stupid can you be? Did he really not think someone would find it?
I've been quiet stressed lately, my depisitions are comming up for my lawsuit, what I wouldn't give for everything to be over with. Its so frustrating, I hate taking time off work, and I have to for all this stupid shit. I've even been thinking of takin on a second job, just so I can get some more money saved up for the house I want to buy. I don't know what to do at this point, winter is comming fast, and I don't know what is going to happen, it all falls on my raise, and my lawsuit. Fuck, i've moved 4 times in the past year, I'm tired of doing it, I'm tired of all my shit in boxes, I'm tired of not knowing where anything is at, I'm tired of not having my own space. Or my own backyard where I can walk outside, half naked with a doob, and chill on my porch. I can't do that, I used to be able to, and it was all gone within a blink of an eye. Fuck, my mind is racing. I can't type fast enough, I will end this one now.

Uhg

2004-07-16T16:32:00.000-04:00

This mornin I got all 4 wisdom teeth extracted. It went really easy, I was in and out of the dentist in about 1 hour, I asked if I could keep my teeth and she said sure I will clean them and you can pick them up later. So then I got all fuckerd up on nitrous which was probably the highlight. When I leave, im numb as hell, when I got home I fell asleep for like 6 hrs. Hehe I don't care, I'm still bleeding some which makes it shitty but I am nice and doped up. I had a cocktail planned for it! Well, I'm tired of typing, I may post later, takin a nap I think sound good right bout now ;)

SUS Deploy

2004-07-15T15:22:00.000-04:00

After reviewing about 100 pages of white paper on Microsoft's Software Update Services, today, I deployed it onto one of the servers. All seems to be going well so far, its now syncronizing with windows update. For all the admins out there, you should check it out, and its free.

Being only 21, I was pretty much raised on Pink Floyd, Sabbath, Doors, etc. Well, the other day the big boss comes in and asks if anyone likes Pink Floyd, I was the only one who said yes. He started talking to me about this Pink Floyd light show he went and seen. Then he asked if I had ever heard about the Dark side of the rainbow. It kind of rang a bell, but then when he started to explain, I was blew away. I know, this is probably an old thing to my older readers, but if you sync up the entire Dark side of the Moon album with the movie The Wizard of Oz, it is a total mind fuck. There are so many things that match up with the album. I found some links for instructions on the sync, Dark Side of Oz

Carebears!

2004-07-14T10:09:00.000-04:00

This was cool, give it a try

Stoner Bear

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

What a weekend

2004-07-12T11:31:00.000-04:00

Since I'm not much of a drinker, all went well for my birthday. We had dinner first, Mom, Dad, me. Needed a drink cause I was with Dad. Christ, everytime I see the guy he makes me cringe. He just generally pisses me off. And he does a good job of it. He is part of the reason I don't drink much, he is an alcoholic. So, everything went ok I guess, I could have done without seeing him for my birthday but whatever, I got $50 bucks out of it. My mom and I went downtown to the casino, I don't know what I expected, but not that. The Casino's downtown aren't anything special at all. Windsor is so much nicer, the people, the dealers, the carpet. I mean, I know its a temporary location and all but jeez, if I could have got one person that worked there to smile, I would have been surprised. But we had fun none the less, didn't win anything, but we had fun. Some strange, drunk fellow gave me $20 bucks that was cool. Would have been cooler if his drunken ass would of mistaken that 20 for a 50 but its all good.
Damn, it is pooring outside, buckets, it was nice all weekend, now its raining so hard, I can hear it.
So here we are, Monday again. I feel like I am forgetting to do something, and it is annoying the hell out of me. Almost lunchtime, and I haven't gotten a thing accomplished. I made one phone call and took a look at a clients machine, but thats it. I don't know what to do about the clients machine, she called on Friday to tell me excel wasn't opening the document right, so I used PC Anywhere to see what was going on, and sure enough, when she would goto open something for excel, it just looked funny. I was going to do a repair on excel, but the I just remembered, the pc probably needs the CD, and i'm an hour away, and I don't feel like driving out there.
On Friday, at work, I got a $30 gift card to Circuit City, and a bouquet of flowers, from my co-workers. My boss was off on Friday, so about 11am, my secretary calls me down, I figure there is something wrong with her PC, no, there is a huge florist bag. I take it upstairs, tear off the top and peek inside because I had no idea who they were from. They were from my boss, a half dozen pink roses, with some nice greenery. I almost cried. Never in my entire life have I recieved anything like that, from my boss. I felt very loved after that. I didn't know whether to call him or email him. So I called, and thanked him and his wife very much. In reality, he will never know how much that meant to me. As I was talking with him, he asked if I had did anything the night before, I told him no because I wanted to make sure I was in at 8am. He just said, don't worry about take it easy today, there's nothing going on. w00t! Then, my other boss let me go home early. Good Friday!

21

2004-07-09T08:30:00.000-04:00

Well, this is it, its here, I am now 21. I don't feel much different cause the stuff that you do when your 21, I've already did. Its cool though, going to casino tonight downtown Detroit, and have some drinks too!

New computer!

2004-07-07T11:36:00.000-04:00

How was everyone's weekend? I watched some fireworks, and watched some drunk guys try to blow off fireworks, amusing.
Anyway, yesterday my boss tells me the computer shop was closed on Monday, so we'll goto CompUSA at 9a.m. We get there and virtually no one there cause they had just opened, we go straight to the computer stuff, and he tells me, "Its your call, pick out what you want". Damn, I wish I could do that at home! Long story short I settled with an ASUS P4P800, Dual DDR and 800MHz FSB, 512MB Ram, Intel 2.8HT, and a Radeon 9600 graphics card. I also got a new case, a black Antec case, its gotta pretty blue light on it. Cost us almost $1000, but like he says, I got to have it. We are still debugging my old one. If we can, we'll use it for another client machine, but that's only if it stays stable, and so far, it hasn't. My new PC hasn't skipped a beat. Its so quiet I can hear other fans over mine.
I got it all put together yesterday, and of course since it was a different chipset, I reinstalled Windows again. No worries, all the stuff I need is on the network, the only thing I loose is my settings, and my music and that simple stuff. As for the rest of it, actual 'work' stuff, I save to the network, we don't backup individual machines yet, just the 6 servers which makes for a whole lot of backups. Soon, we will be backing up workstations, but right now, everything is on the network.

T-Minus 2 days before my birthday, yay. Probably going to the casino's downtown, meet some rich old guy and gamble his money. Heh, I'm good at that. Try not to get too fucked up, but have a good time.

I'm an evil genius!

2004-07-03T14:57:00.000-04:00

I knew it, this is kinda wierd how accurate it is.

Wackiness: 34/100
Rationality: 32/100
Constructiveness: 44/100
Leadership: 40/100

You are an SEDF--Sober Emotional Destructive Follower. This makes you an evil genius. You are extremely focused and difficult to distract from your tasks. With luck, you have learned to channel your energies into improving your intellect, rather than destroying the weak and unsuspecting.

Your friends may find you remote and a hard nut to crack. Few of your peers know you very well--even those you have known a long time--because you have expert control of the face you put forth to the world. You prefer to observe, calculate, discern and decide. Your decisions are final, and your desire to be right is impenetrable.

You are not to be messed with. You may explode.

Take the Better Personality Quiz

My signature color

2004-07-03T01:15:00.000-04:00

Jamie, your signature color is Aqua Paradise

You're one-of-a-kind, that's for sure. A unique individual like you will make her mark with a bold, eye-catching color that's not afraid to be noticed. That's why we're pairing you up with Aqua Paradise. Your friends may sometimes question your choices in everything from what you wear to who you date, but they are likely to admire your willingness to experience all that life has to offer.

That's pretty accurate

My theme song:
My Way

You're a straight-shooter with strong-willed resolve. That's why Limp Bizkit's "My Way" is your theme song. When you're at your best, you're holding court at the local restaurant, or hitting the highway with friends for a road trip. (Of course you're driving). We can see you facing that mechanical bull at the bar—even after it throws you three times in a row. You don't back down easily and you're not afraid to make changes and make them fast. When those first few beats and vinyl scratches start playing in your head, you've got all the motivation you need to speak up, and get started with a new direction. And if others don't immediately appreciate your style, they know where the highway is. You're always ready to do it your way.

Maybe it wasn't my hard drive...

2004-07-02T17:03:00.000-04:00

Well, right as I was finishing that last post about my hard drive, well, it started again, but with my new drive in, I have come to find out it is something else. I literally hit the publish button just in time before a reboot. I said to myself "What the hell is going on?" Of course, it couldn't be that easy, just a new drive. So now I'm thinking, its got to be the motherboard, powersupply or fan. I tested the memory that came back fine, good. My boss got there he took a look and we kept an eye on it, then bam! It did it about three more times, the CPU and system temps were fine. He said, screw it, its not worth dealing with, I'll get you a new case, P4, and motherboard on Monday. Sweet. He said that my computer has to be running and in good condition, wierd thing is this computer is only 2 years old, motherboard shouldn't have gone that quick. But he's right, my shit's gotta be good, to run the place. Good thing I still have my old hard drive, I can just copy it onto my new one!
Plus, we got off early today, the manager's bday was today and let us go about 3:30, plus I have Monday off paid!! w00t! Let the games begin!

I had it, but I lost it...

2004-07-02T09:58:00.000-04:00

I was writing a pretty big entry the other day, nearly finishing it, and BAM my computer reboots. Damnit. My hard drive basically said "No more" and went dead. This caused a lil panic, because my computer is the nerve of the network. I called my boss, he told me to take the corperate credit card goto staple and pick up a hard drive, I got a cdrom too, because I think that went also. I goto leave and I forgot, I don't have my truck! My Mom has it because hers is getting fixed, I went downstairs to the garage, and took a service truck, thank god we have 4 F-250's laying around. Went to Staples, got my stuff, then had a hell of a time getting XP to install. It took almost all day, just to get XP installed. I was getting pretty pissy by this point, I didn't have the internet, my settings, my music, I didn't have anything. I finally get the OS installed, and start to get everything back where I had it, damn it was 5 by that time!
I had a good post going too, I remember it had something to do with the T1, and that it's finally clean and clear, no errors. And it was SBC's issue. I don't remember what else I had in there, damn, wish I could remember.
Anyway, my birthday is in a week, whoohoo. I still don't know what I'm doing probably just end up downtown at the casino's. Hell, I don't even know what's going on for the 4th of July. I'm sure I will find some chaos to dance in.

I'm kinda bored, I have stuff to do, just don't want to do it. I have to clear my old harddrive off and look for the code to the shitty website we have. I also need to install that SUS software. I really need to get that rolling, that will make it that much easier to update clients. Especially in light of recent virus issues. I think I have convinced my boss to make our clients use Mozilla. Just for security issues, we can't stop where they go, but I can stop the damn trojans from circulating.
Its weird because I rarely feel this way, but I want to get fucked up. I mean, it's been a while, I feel the need to be a few sheets in the wind.
Maybe it's because its July and we have the fourth in a few days and we have my birthday the weekend after. I think I am getting my tattoo for my birthday. Thats what I want, so I am makin the appointment. As long as Mom doesn't bitch too much, we'll be good.

More later if I think of it

My teeth....

2004-06-29T14:54:00.000-04:00

Ugh, I had a dentist appointment today, I hate the dentist. My wisdom teeth have been bothering me for awhile now, and now that I have good insurance with work. I needed to get them looked at, as well as some x-rays and teeth cleaning. This was the first time I had been in this office. Damn, was it nice. You could tell everything was brand new, from the office chairs to the equipment. I get into the chair and they have movies you can watch on a flat panel! The lady popped in "How to lose a guy in 10 days" I was like ok, I'm not much for chick flicks I think they are dumb and this one proved to not be any better. But it was a nice thing to have. She starts on all these xrays and blah blah. Then they come into clean my teeth. That went good, then she asked me if I wanted my wisdom teeth out now, while I was in the chair. I was like hell no, I first need to prep myself for it. Not only that, but I was supposed to be to work by 12. So, after my wisdoms get yanked, I'm getting the invisalign braces to straighten my teeth out a bit and push the two front together. I am not looking forward to this. I have a headache now because she was messing with my jaw, and it hurts, I can't even open it that wide without pain. So she suggested I get them out ASAP. Next week I get them out.

In my IT news, my boss brought me in a free server based proggy from Microsoft. Its a utility that distributes security patches to all clients running XP. I thought it was pretty cool. Now I am just making sure we have everything together so we can install it on one of our servers. It seems like a pretty useful program. It will make my job a bit easier so I don't have to use PC anywhere to connect to our remote locations and update their machines. I am playing around with deployment options right now. Once I get it installed and working I will let you know how good it is.

I love Fridays!

2004-06-25T15:53:00.000-04:00

I have had a pretty good day. Got to work this morning, had to do a few things, no biggie. My boss came to my building early because he was leaving at noon to go up north for the weekend. He says to me "you know, you have personal days, take 'em. Don't worry about it just take a day off" I was like that is so nice, how many bosses do you know that says that to their assistant. I think he's real pleased with my performance which is a very good thing. Then, the controller which is just basically a head manager, sent me to Wendy's for Frosties. I went to Wendy's and just got back. I went inside because the drive thru looked busy, so I am inside, looking around watching employees get fries and drinks, and thinkning to myself, god, I am so, so, so glad I don't have to do that anymore. Before I got hired in here, all I did was restaurant work. I hated it so much. Since I was 14 up until I got hired here I worked in various restaurants. Anywhere from fast food to fine dining. I was a cook, the only female on a 8 person male line. I guess it just makes me feel lucky to be where I'm at and be glad I put myself through college to get this far only being 20. Its so mellow in the office. I love it, got ATB on my speakers, just goofin off basically. It makes you feel good when your appreciated and I've never had a job like that. I love it.

The found the asshole that open-fired at the Detroit fireworks on Wednesday. I hope the burn the guys balls off, there were so many children there, thankfully no one was killed.

Any of my tech-savy readers out there come check out Computer Help Forums, they are a great group of people, and I am a moderator there. The link is on the side of my blog. I'm thinking of making a new template for my blog, I dunno what it will be yet, but I'm coming up with ideas.

I also kinda got a special assignment. I need to add onto a website we have but it cannot be accessed by the public and an ftp needs to be set up. I haven't done coding in a very long time, I'm kinda skerd because I don't want the big wigs to think I'm an idiot. So, I need to get down with some pagemaker or Dreamweaver.

The boy, well, its all good so far. I'm not here to break up marriages at all. And he knows it. I already told him, if you and your wife split up, look me up. We will see how it goes. This isn't the first time I've been in a predicament with a married guy. My professor in college was nuts over me, and he was married. I basically told him to goto hell. He was a x-Marine, I've heard too many bad stories. It didn't go over too well. So that's my daily update. I may post more later!!

The boy

2004-06-24T09:04:00.000-04:00

I can't help it this guy is driving me nuts. I literally have to stay away from places that I might be left alone with him. We start goofing off, then he hugs me, rubs on my back, neck, all very sweet spots of mine. All at the same time "he is married" rolls through the very back of my head. I have had my eye on him since I started here, found out he was married, and let it go. Then, when he starts flirting, joking, pokin me, it just kinda keeps spinning, thank god we are at work, and if it wasn't for fear of getting caught, I don't know what would have happened by now. Shit! This sucks. I'm going to have to ride this out. Oh, did I mention, his mother works here, on my floor. Yeah, wouldn't this be just great if anything gets out. I've got to keep my distance, I have to keep telling myself this. I can see clearly it can't go any further, and no one can know. If he only wasn't married. But, even he told me and so did his mother, that he moved out and got married because of his step dad. He couldn't live there, so kinda jumped into the family thing real quick. Hrmm, I wonder how his mom would feel about having me as a daughter-inlaw. No, no, no. No marriage, not now. Not even in the near future. I don't really need paper to tell me I love someone you know? I do, however need paper if it happens to be a rich old guy. Joking. So any thoughts or suggestions are appreciated.

In other news, the Detroit fireworks went off last night. What a show, we had some really good ones. That is a job I would love to do. Pyrotechnician. It always fascinated me how they did that. Unfortunately, 9 people were shot last night amist all the activities. Someone open fire in the crowd shortly after a robbery. The guy got away, but they are still looking for him. Its too bad everyone can't enjoy the fireworks, someone has to be an asshole. That's why I don't go down there, too many people, not enough safety. I have been down there enough for big events, and seen too much happen. Not to mention the fact that every year something happens. I am surprised there wasn't any riots.

We took off the surge suppressor, and we still get errors on the T1 line. So guess what, SBC, its your turn. We have replaced everything possible and still receive too many errors. They have no choice, its something on their side, our configuration, wiring, everything is correct. Should be interesting to find out what it is.

DEA, Slow week

2004-06-22T09:14:00.000-04:00

I don't know if I talked about it in an earlier post, but while gmailswapping, someone posted a swap for DEA Merchandise. Well, I happen to love shit like that. So I email the guy, we discuss and he even gave me his cell phone number to verify he was from the DEA. I was thinkin damn, this DEA agent will give his number to anyone?? So, I ask for a cup and hat, give him my address(after that I realized, I just gave a DEA agent my address) just to see what happens. Lo and behold, I get home yesterday from work and there is a package from the US Dept. Of Justice, Drug Enforcement Administration. Shipped priority, all wrapped up. I was giddy. I got the damn box open and I got this killer coffee mug that's got our U.S. symbol(you know what I mean) and embossed in gold. Also, got the DEA hat too. I feel special. I showed one of my friends and they didn't believe me it was the real thing, so I showed them the box, I guess even I was surprised I recieved it. I love it though, probably never will be in Washington D.C. and I got DEA stuff. I will post pics later, they are at home.

We are slow these couple weeks, mainly because we have huge projects to do and have to do them in moderation. The guy(who was very hot)came to install the new T1 line. It didn't take him long, and he knew what he was doing, which was comforting. You call SBC, you get a shitty cable and no test to see if it works. So, we plug it in this morning, so that we didn't disturb clients yesterday, and guess what, yep, still taking some errors. I knew it wasn't the line. Now, that leaves us with two things, 1)Surge Suppressor thats on the line is shot 2)SBC's issue. I'm guessing it will be #2. We have already replaced a router, CSU, and T1 line, and still taking errors. Its not alot, but enough to worry about. Especially when finacials are going over the line.
So my boss told me, if you want to experiement, go ahead. Make a server, make a lil network, make anything. I thought that was pretty nice, I can just screw around and get paid, ok no problem. Damn, I love my job

2004-06-19T01:02:00.000-04:00

Rest in Peace Paul Johnson Jr.

2004-06-18T21:51:00.000-04:00

Today, an American captive was beheaded by Al Qaeda group in Saudi Arabia. My heart goes out to his family. It will only get worse, that is the sad part.

In fact today, Mr. President screw up Bush himself, said, something about there was no reason for them to do this, like he has room to talk. I hope that mother fucker is out of office this year, or we can all kiss our asses goodbye

All is quiet on the Friday

2004-06-18T13:20:00.000-04:00

Ok, that was a dumb title but oh well. It is quiet, all of a sudden on my floor there was a hush, no keyboards, staplers or mouse clicks. I got off my ass to look and everyone is gone. Kick ass. It was someone's birthday earlier this week, they probably went to lunch. I like it when its quiet, but not for too long. Kinda gets creepy. Anyway, my birthday is coming up, July 9th. 21 years old, finally. Its not even the drinking part I'm excited about. Its the lower cover for 21 and up, its the fact that I don't have to drive to Canada and deal with customs just to have a few hands at the blackjack table. Now, I just go downtown. 3 big ass casinos, I love gambling, the risk, the wins and losses. Its just fun to me, I dunno why and I can see why people don't like it. It is throwing your money out, but when ya hit, they don't say that. Just one of those things I never thought I would like, and I like it. I'm finding more and more of those, for instance, never thought I liked Thai food, but I love it. Its almost as I can see myself evolving into something different everyday, trying to figure things out and keep my feet on the ground. I'm trying very, very hard to buy a house. Its the down payment that's killing me. Plus, cost of living in Michigan is very high. You can buy 2 houses in Florida for what you pay for 1 house in Michigan. Its quiet frustrating since, I don't have anyone I can trust to help me finance a house, and I really have no knowledge of what's right and what's wrong, as far as mortgages go. My father never provided us with a home, in fact, in a recent blowout, he told me (more like yelled) "I didn't buy a house because your mother would have taken it from me". WOW what a blow. Now, I'm 20 and was left high and dry. But that's a real long story. But, in a nutshell, mom is on disability due to her back and only gets $565 MONTHLY from the government. So its me and her. We were in a house for 10 years, 2bdr 1 acre of property, my Dad had a chance to buy it, never signed the paper work. Was in and out my whole life. So, longer story short, got an eviction notice 30 days before Christmas 2003, after living there 10 years. The owner of the house, his son was being evicted and they evicted us to move him in there. I miss that house so much it hurts. Now, my main focus is to find another house and BUY it so my mom and I will have some sense of stability. I've never had that before, thing that sucks is with my Mom's health condition, she wants to move to Florida, she just can't take the winters here. But she doesn't want to leave me and I don't want to goto Florida, mainly because of my job. I really love my job, and feel comfortable here and appreciated. I never had that feeling before in a work environment. Plus my boss is great and will work with me, teach me things and he doesn't get pissed if I don't know something, he is more than happy to teach me. That is very hard to find. I don't know what's going to happen, If I had a crystal ball I surely would be looking into it now, but since I don't, I just have to keep pushing.

Lets see on another note, I am searching for a nice laserjet (HP) because one of ours went dead. I didn't realize how expensive some are. We have to watch budget, because we have other projects that need to be completed. Such as, new CAT5 through the building, a new tape drive and an upgrade to Exchange 2003. These are necessities in our set-up. Also, we are trying to upgrade all clients to WinXP machines. I get so much experience here, especially with servers and network administration. That's what I love.
that's all for now folks, I know probably a boring entry but eh, whateva! That was ghetto, sry bout that.

Gmail swappin, Piston DO win!

2004-06-17T09:09:00.000-04:00

Pistons did it! World champs! They deserve it after all these years. We sent LA home in shame. Deeetroit Basketball! I heard guns, fireworks, pots and pans, you name it we heard it all over the state of Michigan after they won. It was a great moment and today is the parade.

Gmailswap is really very very cool. I take my invites that gmail gives me and people offer things for the invites. I got free WAP on my phone, which is the best swap yet, I'm using Mmode and AT&T doesn't know about it. I'm not even getting data charges to be on AIM or MSN. That kicks ass. Also, I almost got piston tickets, and I am getting a boomerang from Austrailia!! I love it, get cool shit for free.

I am waiting on some company to give us a quote to run a few Ethernet cables in the building, hopefully once they are ran, it will get rid of the CRC and Frame errors on the Cisco. We would run it ourselves, but if you seen the building I work in, you would understand its easier just to hire someone. Its an old ass building with 3 levels and kinda confusing if you don't know the building. We'll see how that goes. More later I'm sure.

Power!!

2004-06-15T10:11:00.000-04:00

We got some wicked weather again yesterday, and my mom calls me at work about 4pm and says the power has went off and on like 6 times. I'm like great, I have a surge protector on my pc, but I don't really trust them. Plus, I didn't remember if I had left it on or not. So, I leave work at 5 and traffic was all messed up, ended up taking me 45 minutes to get home. I was pissed. I get home, still no power, everything is semi quiet. Blinds were dimmed and no one was home so I grabbed my trusty bowl and proceeded to chill out for a good half hour, then, on came the power :) my computer was fine thank God!

The boy, is 23 or 24 (I like older ones) and there is definatly minor/major flirtation when alone with this one. The other day, we were in the back alone, turning lights off and he grabbed me by the waist to make me stop walkings then grabbed my shoulders and was rubbin em'. I was like hmpmhhmp. Now, before anyone starts thinking anything, I did nothing to provoke it(flirting). One problem, he's married. Fuck. Unhappily, but I'm not a home wrecker. He only married the girl cause he wanted out his house from his stepdad, and he got her prego. He takes care of buisness for only 23, and I like that. He also takes care of her other kid. But, I think I'm gonna tell him, if he ever decides to leave his wife, look me up. Thats the easiest way to do this. Always a day late and a dollar short.

Pistons game is on tonight, and I got Dr.'s appt. I hate going, I just want to go home and rest. I am super tired today, even debated calling off. But, I didn't. I am up for a 10% raise in July, I don't want to fuck that up. Besides, its mellow today, we are having an audit, and it has nothing to do with my department. I can't stop yawning, this sucks.

I'm gonna updates some Windowz machines, cause they need it. Plus, I have to call one of our suppliers, I need some stuff for the office, I went through all our backup UPS's with these storms, and I need another monitor. Either than that, I'm just hangin out in my office where the air is cool and music is bumpin on my speakers.

Pistons and Iraq

2004-06-14T10:58:00.000-04:00

Pistons won AGAIN last night, here in Detroit. That makes it 3-1. Next game, Tuesday night in LA. This could be the Championship winner. W00t!!

In other news, I stumbled upon a blog, that is written by Iraqis. Its basically a tale into the life of war, what we never see on CNN, or any TV station. It was quite intresting, to hear their views, and daily trials with the American soldiers being over there. They can't even sleep at night because of the bombings. I guess we should consider ourselves lucky. I mean, these families are over there, not knowing if one explosion or another is going to take out thier whole family. They have to flee thier homes at a seconds notice, when the explosions start. They run off generators and school themselves in between bomb attacks. Its quite sad, but I guess thats what war just is, sad. A family in Baghdad
Read it, follow the links, just to see what they go through.

I really dig this guy at work, and he digs me, but thier are a few barriers...more on tht later

Stormin'

2004-06-13T20:42:00.000-04:00

We are getting some more crazy weather, its kinda neat. All bright on one side and dark as hell on the other. I like storms, I have always wanted to see a real tornado.

In other news in about 15 minutes, the Pistons will be playing game 3 of the finals here in Detroit. They are 2-1 with the Lakers, hopefully we will be kickin ass!! We beat em last game, by 20 point! First championship since 1991. Go Pistons!

Fireworks!!

2004-06-12T22:30:00.000-04:00

BOOM BOOM I hear outside and its fireworks!! I love fireworks, I dunno why they were going on so early, but it was kick ass. They went on for bout an hour. I love fireworks

Busy..

2004-06-07T22:01:00.000-04:00

Been busy, working. Lots of projects going on. Feel like we are pissing on a forest fire. Keeps us busy. Job security gotta have it. Especially this day and age. I am so thankful for my job its unbelieveable. In other news, my lawsuit is in full force. So, hopefully we get this thing over with. I'm so tired of going through all the shit.

I almost got thrown out of a local cop shop. My mom got sideswipped, by a landscaping truck and I met her down at the police dept. I ended up getting loud with the officer because he was being a complete dick. I can't stand cops that don't have any compasion. Please don't be a dick to me, I am a law abiding(most of the time) citizen. So yeah, that was fun, I love to piss off cops. Specially when I'm right.

The Pistons are in the Finals! First time in I don't know how long. We gonna kick ass!! Go Detroit!!

My First Tattoo

2004-05-31T14:31:00.000-04:00

My Tattoo
This is my new tattoo! I just got a small one to start off, then I will get my fairy done. I went to a place and wasn't even planning on getting it. But, it took about 30 minutes and was nothing! I can't wait to get the other one done!

comments...

2004-05-28T22:40:00.000-04:00

Uh, you guys can leave some comments...make me feel alone...
Its Memorial weekend, got let off early from work. w00t! I also have Monday off paid baby! I love my job. Hopefully I get my tat done this weekend! I will post some pics if I get it!

popped my cisco cherry!

2004-05-28T13:27:00.000-04:00

Don't ask me where I came up with that. But, yeah between today and yesterday, I got to configure and go live with a brand new Cisco 1700. Great fun. I have configured Cisco's before but only in a 'lab' environment. So this was a little different, a real network. It was fun and I caught the hang of it real easy. I did the whole config in a hour. Then, this morning, we went live with it. Everything went great. Then we were watching the stats and STILL recieving errors. That means in the end, it is SBC's problem. We switch to brand new equipment and low and behold, we still get errors. We still work over the T1 but with caution and we watch it. In fact, I just looked at it and I reset it about 10 min ago and we have 6 CRC's and 9 input errors. We are going to have 1 CAT5 replaced in the building to rule that out.
I really like Cisco's and now this makes me want to get back into the Cisco training. Only if I had the time, but at least I can play with this one and learn as much as possible.

Peace...

Too much...

2004-05-26T14:46:00.000-04:00

Hi, to all my readers(yeah right). So lets see, what has been up. I have been busy with doctors and my lawsuit stuff. I have informed my attorney that there is a chance of me killing the bitch when I see her in court. I guess this would be the time to do the fill in about the accident.

Kinda a long story, but it may explain alot. I was in 12th grade and we had our "Snowball" dance, kinda like homecoming but in the winter. Well, I wasn't going to go, I worked all day that day and I just didn't feel like it. I wasn't the type to participate in those school functions anyway, so it wasn't a biggie to me. I get home from work that night and mom says to me, Brian is pickin up your dress and I got everything ready for you. That was so nice, she got everything all set so when I got home from work all I had to do was take a shower get dressed, and goto the dance. Brian btw, was my date for the night, he was a close friend for a long time and we basically grew up together. So, we were going just as friends and to have a good time. Anyway, we goto the dance and since it was late, we didn't eat first. We goto the dance have a good time, then follow a couple friends to a room they had rented. When we got there, the room was FULL of people and was basically a sitting duck for cops to show up. So, Brian said lets get outta here, and get something to eat. We also have another couple with us so there are 4 total. So, being that it was late, not many places are open, we goto Steak n' Shake. That is where I worked at, at the time. We eat, now its about 2 a.m. I called my mom to let her know we were on our way home. We leave the resturaunt and we're driving down the road and this car in front of us looks like its in our lane, just a few seconds later we realize that she is in our lane, Brian swerved into the other lane, then swerved back, she was following our head lights and BAM. Hit us head on at about 45mph. I don't remember much else so I will try to explain. I was knocked unconcous for a few seconds, when I came to all I could see was cloudy white stuff, it looked like smoke so I thought the car may be on fire. I force the door open and fall to the cement. I get back up and stumbled to the side of the road, I put my hand on my face and my hand came back with blood all over it. I panicked. Blood was gushing from my nose, mouth and my eye. After alot of commotion the cops and ambulance get there and see that I have a massive laceration through my eyebrow. I don't remember much else. We were in a 2001 Monte Carlo, with like 6000 miles on it. The other driver was in a newer Escort. We totalled the Monte, there was hardly anything left of it. We later learned she was drunk. She said to the judge she had just left a friends house and thought she was on a different road. Which was total bullshit. So now, three years later we are finally starting to get the suit settled. I suffer many problems now because of this accident. I have mild to moderate brain damage, lost about 75lbs in a year or two, short term and long term memory loss, I have severe headaches which I get botox injections for and yes they help immensly, back and neck problems and from the blow to my head, I have narcolepsy. Yeah it sucks real bad. There are so many times I wish the bitch would have killed me, instead of having to go through a lifetime of pain and problems that would have never been there if it wasn't for a stupid drunk bitch. I treat with so many doctors it isn't even funny. I know life ain't fair, but damn. Thats the story, or at least what I can remember. Please, don't drink and drive. But, after all that, I graduated High School, and started college two weeks after that. Graduated college too. I'm not even 21 yet. I have my associates in computer networking and I have a great job that I cannot be thankful enough for. But, 3 years later, and I am still recovering from what that bitch did to me that night and for the rest of my life. Please don't drink and drive.

In other normal daily news, I got my mom a new cell and its cool as hell. Her contract was up and they gave me a hella deal. AT&T rules as a cell carrier. I have been with them so long I get most everything for free, they really do appreciate my business. When I got my phone, it retailed at $300, I got it for FREE. Plus a great plan!

Work is good, I am takin over the phone system also. That should be fun. I am trying to learn as much as possible here and this is the place to learn it at. We have lots going on at all times, this is my first 'career' job. Everyone gets along, and the company has been around since 1951.

Our T1 has been down, and we find out its a bad router on my side. We ordered a new Cisco and I get to configure it. My boss like to teach me stuff and give me a chance to do it so I know how to do it. I haven't configured a Cisco, besides in class and that was pointless. I just didn't get it, so this was I will be able to see how it goes in a real environment. Then, on Monday, my boss came in and said that at our other company, a truck driver was taking a shipment out of the yard, well, we have a fiber cable that goes from one building to another. The cable was hanging too low and YANK...ripped the cable right out the building and everything. We got a quote to fix it and its 550ft of fiber cable and $4500!! What the fuck, is the shit gold or something?? I did find it kinda humerous, since there is nothing we could do about it, just get it fixed.
There is my post for the day, I will write more later if I get a chance!

Wicked...

2004-05-22T01:00:00.000-04:00

Today, at around 2:20pm, I had witnessed the most wicked storm I have ever seen in my 20 years on what they call Earth. I am at work, my boss always looks at the weather, and he e-mails me telling me there is a bad storm commin over us. Last night we had some hella rain and a bunch of communities were already flooded. So, bout 20 minutes later one of my co-workers comes upstairs and told us a tornado had just touched down at Detroit Metro Airport, where I work is about 30 minutes away. Everyone picked up their phone almost immediately, after we gauked out the window, looking at these green swirling sky's and rain like a waterfall. It happened so fast, it amazed me and scared the holy shit out of me at the same time. I called my mom, made sure she was ok, told her I would call her back, I had to make sure the tapes were changed, and check on the equipment, in case we get hit. Next thing we know, there goes the sirens, my heart dropped. I have never actually heard them go off...I was freaked out. By this time we all head downstairs, you can't even see outside, we are talkin 70mph winds, hail, rain and the sky was a blackish green. I'm thinkin, damn, I don't want to go out like this I want to at least be smokin a doob or something. So, the pretty much everyone in the building is downstairs in the safest room, then it starts letting up, it lasted about 5 maybe 10 minutes but I was skerd...I was worried about my mom too, she is all alone, in a fuckin condo. The sirens stopped, things let up, my heart took awhile to stop poundin. But that was definitely the most crazy storm I have ever seen. That was prob too long and boring but I had to blog it :)

In other news, our T1 has been down for like 3 days, and we finally figured out its our router. So we are getting a new Cisco and my boss is going to teach me how to configure it. I love getting all this experience. Its great, and I couldn't ask for a better boss. He is a great guy who knows alot and is totally cool with me. Plus, the other day when we were leavin, he told me he got an E-mail from his boss(the big boss) giving me a compliment. That is hard to acquire from this guy, he is nice and all, but just hard to please and 'different'. So that made me really happy. Its things like that, that make me happy. It feels good when you are appreciated.

And, lets see, oh and if you haven't seen this yet, it is fabulous. Its a story of a scammer being scammed on Ebay. P-P-P-Powerbook
Hilarious

More to come, I am sure

Whew...

2004-05-18T09:52:00.000-04:00

I know I haven't updated. There has been much going on but to explain it is brutal and long. Couple weekends ago, there was some serious retarded drama between me, my friend, her boy, and this asshole that we are all friends with. Well, this mutual friend between us decided to start some unnecessary bullshit between me and my friend and her boy. Coming up with all kinds of shit that had never been said. So, long story short, we don't talk to him cause this isn't the first time he has started crap with other friends of theirs. Hard to explain...see?
I got my Nextel and of course, I get all walkie talkie happy and look for ppl to direct connect. I know it sounds stupid, but I'm over it now, I just had to get that out of my system. I have had it for bout 2 or 3 weeks and no stupid late night calls or weekend callers. Just this morning I had a user call me at 7:30am, but its cool, I was getting ready to leave my house. More on that later.

Hmm, oh yeah, I got new sunglasses from my doc, I didn't want those transitions because I work in florecent light and I have heard that they change or get tinted, so I just got a new pair. Thank god my AAA covers it, or else I wouldn't have picked out the $600 RayBans!

Lets see, what else...thanks to a new friend I made over at bodymod.org, he turned me onto this awsome site for streaming nothing but trance, house, goa, hard house, Euro dance and it ROCKS. Digitally Imported He rocks too :)

And all that crap with TechTv sucks and is sad. I am sorry to see you guys go. But as they say, all good things must come to an end...damn thats a bitch. But all of you are very talented and won't have issuse finding new places of employement. And if you are going to G4, watch out for the drug tests ;) For real, it was very shitty what they did, but I gues when your in the biz, shit happens.

One of my friends that I graduated college with is off to live with her man in Virginia. Kinda sucks cause we had good times. I will miss her, but she's doing it cause she loves him and I guess she's ready. She's having a hard time finding work here so, it's probably best.

I think I may start a "Tech only blog" and then keep this blog as a personal. I have things to talk about in both area's. But rather keep it seperate, it makes more sense to me. In the tech side of my life, it will probably include, what happened at work and new products and reviews or something like that.

And the Movement Festival is comming up on Memorial Day weekend. Formerly known as the Detroit Electronic Music Festival. Oh boy that is the weekend I look forward to all year. Great DJ's from all over including great local talent. Its free and all you gotta do is dance. Can't wait. To check it out, its here

Hmm, thats all I can think of now, if more comes to me then I will post, and I will update more. Just sometimes, things suck so bad, you don't even want to put them here. But anyway, yeah I will update more.

War Sucks

2004-04-27T11:37:00.000-04:00

I was just reading something, somewhere about all the fallen heros. Kinda makes you take a step back and ask "why am I not over there helping?" Because of choice. I don't know exactly where I am going with this so bear with me. I have alot of different views on whats going on oversea's. If you look at deaths of American soldiers, they are up and thier age is down. Mostly 20-30's many people that haven't even reached 20 yet are dead. I blame our government for most of it. These recruiters tell all these kids, "Sign here, 2 weeks a month 3weeks a year, and you will never have to worry about college tuition." Wow. I prob. would have signed up too, but I knew better. Anything can happen at any time and once your name is on that paper, they fuckin own you. End of story, your ass is going to Iraq, we don't care how old you are, if you have never had the chance to live, have kids, or even graduate college. We are the government and we are going to send you over there, not for any specific purpose, but more or less just to sit there and wait. That is how this shit makes me feel. Suicide is up from American Soldiers. They are fucking scared, wouldn't you be? They know their chances of comming back are slim to none. If they do come back they will NOT be the same person. I would probably kill myself too if I got sent, fuck you Mr. Bush, you couldn't even make it for boot, what room do you have to talk? I guess I just don't get it. So many world secrets, unjustified statistics, lies and bullshit. We will never know the truth, that is for sure. We will never know why Saddam did what he did and why, this shit has been going on for centuries, and now we are going to severly piss them off, all the while, we have no clue as to what they are capable of. Scary fuckin thought isn't it.....

G-Mail is very cool

2004-04-26T22:34:00.000-04:00

2004-04-26T18:39:00.000-04:00

I came across this little video, that is funny, in a twisted kinda way. Thanks Cat Schwartz

In other news, I decided to jump on the Gmail Beta bandwagon, what the hell could it hurt? And Ray seems to approve, so I will give it a whirl.

I walk into work today to be greeted with a call from a branch thats about 45min away, "I can't connect". I was like shit. Talk about "Hello Monday". So I do some troubleshooting, decide its SBC call them, they call me back bout 2hrs later telling me I have a bad CSU. Now, this equipment isn't ours, its a merger's. So we don't pay for it, or support it. Or we aren't suppost to. So, we decide that we better go out there so our user could dial in so she could work. My boss likes to make the day out of going to a branch, he doesn't try to make it back so I'm cool with it. We go out there, do some bullshit, restart thier router and swing by another branch to talk to thier IS person. He doesn't seem very concerned and says he's got another card and he will put it in tomorrow....k cool, we head back, its now about 3pm kick ass. So, ended up being a day in the car. Oh, and work is getting me a Nextel, it will be here Wednesday. Cool, now I can recieve stupid ass calls at stupid times? No, they aren't that bad, haha I can just see this shit now, I am all fucked up on the weekend or some crazy shit, and one of the owners call, "Hey, I can't get my mail". Oh shit, gather your thoughts and spit some bullshit out. Haha this should be good.

2004-04-24T22:34:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I know I haven't updated in a while, but things have been crazy. I had a real bad day today, started off with this guy I barely know and just recently met calling me crying cause someone fucked his mustang up bad last night. So im like ok...then I got into real bad with my dad on the phone, he is a piece of shit and just can't come to reality. Things have just been really intense. I have been tryin to keep my cool but fuck man what the hell am I suppost to do. As a matter of fact, I don't know what I'm gonna do. There is alot more going on I just don't feel like typing it out. I have no life, no real friends, nothing....I just feel very empty right now. Maybe I will feel better tomorrow and write some more. Just have to see what happens

2004-04-19T09:56:00.000-04:00

Monday...Again

First off I would like to thank Cody for my blog facelift. It looks really great and I can't thank him enough for it. Nice blogs makes me want to write in it. So I got here today to finish dealing with those Blackberry's. Everything is cool, we got everything set up, the guys may need a lil training cause there is so much to them. But they should be alright.
The cleaning ppl came in over the weekend and put some funky shit on my desk. Things are stickin and my mouse won't move very well, assholes. It was a beutiful weekend. 80 both days. We haven't seen something like that in Michigan in a long time. Had lots of things to do, we had to move stuff around and go visit a friend of mine who's grandfather had just passed. It was nice, but too short.
In other news I am still rackin my brain as to ways to make some money. I need to buy a house, this no room shit isn't cutting it. Plus, I miss my yard alot. Never thought I would miss cutting 4 hours worth of grass, but I miss is dearly. I am looking into buying a house, but I want to move back to the country I hate everyone being on top of you(no pun). No privacy at all. Plus, my next door neighbor is a cop. Yep a fuckin cop. He seems cool, but still he's a cop. I have lots of shit to do, and don't know where to start. Its 70 outside right now, do u think I want to be locked up in my cube? Today will be a wandering day.....I can feel it already. In fact, a cigarette sounds good right now, I think I am going to my hiding spot.
So yah, my goals are money right now. Don't know how it will get to me but, I will figure somethin out. Peace out till later

2004-04-16T15:39:00.000-04:00

I will go into detail later, I'm trying my best not to make this a depressing blog but I have to vent this shit as it comes, this is me. My brain is scrambled. So, I will try and explain l8ter.

2004-04-16T15:36:00.000-04:00

Life fucking sux, thats all for today folks, I wonder everyday why I was born. In other words I regret being born. I can't do it anymore, too much.

2004-04-13T10:08:00.000-04:00

Okay okay now where was I? Oh yeah, boss walked in so had to give him an update of what is going on around here. Remember bfore when I said my boss has givin me cool shit, well he gave me a test compy yesterday! Whoo Hoo. Now I have something to blow up! Err...not really.
Today should be relativly slow, not too much going on, got alot of problems solved btween today and yesterday. I downloaded Firefox for work cause I just can't stand IE anymore. And now I'm using aim express so shhh don't tell. I keep looking for intresting blogs to read and they are hard to come by. Like I have room to talk. Hopefully, this will become intresting. I need to spend some time with it to make it look kick ass and stuff. I keep forgetting to bring in Photoshop cause I want to play with it when I don't have anything going on. Sometimes at work, I feel a little left out. I am the youngest person in the entire company and I just feel kinda out the loop, lots of these ppl are two faced, almost like two completely personalities. I dunno I'm prob just paranoid. I just confine myself in my cube and listen to everyone else. You would think me being the admin, I would be snoppin in everyone's shit, I'm not like that unless you give me a reason. I would be pissed if someone was diggin' around in my shit. Damn, I am tired today, real tired. *Pill* Mmm hopefully that will help. Narcolepsy SUCKS. But yeah, the people around here, a little stiff and ALL REPUBLICAN. I hate fucking politics and since I work with rich ppl, they are Bush supporters. I try to stay out of the shit. But, I have been through alot of shit, grew up low-income and they just don't understand that. Its not my fault and I'm doing the best to change it, but they have no clue what its like not to have money, a house, or anything that those ungrateful fucks take for granted. Whew, that was a rant. Hope nobody finds this lol.
Oh in other news, went home last night after work and I had been downloading the Matrix from Cody and it was finished when I got home, I look, and get a message saying it couldn't complete. FUCK. I just waited like 5 days for nothin :( Oh well, either try it again or have him burn it and just send it to me snail mail. So I do what else I gotta do, mom and I leave for dinner, come back so I could finish those fucked up irrogatories and dsl is dead and so is my phone. MOTHER FUCKER. I was fuckin pissed, got on the phone with SBC, as if I haven't dealt with them enough at work, and bitched them out. They give me the rain excuse "Has it been raining or storming?" I said if one more fucking person asks me that I will fucking go balistic. The fucking rain is a cop out and I want my fucking bill credited bitch. Whew, sorry SBC and me don't mix.
Tomorror I have to goto our parent comany to learn the Blackberry setup, should be intresting. And, I will be very pissed if I can't get ahold this guy I got into my accident with. I don't know if he thinks I am suing him or what. But its pissing me off cause I have no one as witness who was there at the time of the accident. I am gonna try calling one more time and then let my attorney deal with it. Not my fuckin problem he is a moron. I just hope its over with soon. Well, I may post later but till then, L8ter Gator

2004-04-12T14:34:00.000-04:00

Ok, I haven't posted all weekend, well because the weekend sucked. Fuck the holidays in general. But, the Tigers are 5-1 that is the best stats for starting off the season I have ever seen. I have to finish irriogatories for my attorney or else he will kick my ass, I guess its just I'm afraid I might leave something out, something important. I guess just fill them out. They just ask me really stupid fucking questions that just piss me off.
So here it is Monday, not too much going on around here today, pretty quiet, boss isn't back yet. I have been waiting on Symantec to call me about their firewalls that won't stay connected for a 24 hour period. They think its DHCP renewal thats killing the connection, we will see. I am also waiting for a company called salesnet to get back with me, I have a user that well is a complete moron when it comes to anything technical, but yeah he can't log into this program. I have told him 20 fckin times we didn't do it. Its a totally diff proggy not even on our servers. Oh well, nothin like waiting on assholes to finish your job. boss here more later.

2004-04-08T19:42:00.000-04:00

THE TIGERS WON!! WHOOO HOOOO

2004-04-08T14:18:00.000-04:00

Another busy day before the weekend, had SBC back on the phone today for a good 3 hours. Man, they need to get their shit together. How can your LAN and WAN IP be the same? Anyway, today is the Detroit Tigers opening day. Should be an intresting year. Everyone gets excited this time of year in hopes that the Tigers will do something like the RedWings, but they start to loose, and well you have one pissed off city. I have the game in realtime right now, kinda neat.
In other news, I really need to put some of my style on this. Gets kinda boring fast.
My boss is the shit. He really is, not many ppl can say that about thier supervisor, but I can. I have already obtained a Sony laptop, and a linksys firewall router. Oh and he bought me a Godsmack CD(Yep, he likes Godsmack too) So I think that fuckin rocks! I am thinking of getting a new hole in my body, just haven't quiet decided where, it kinda has to be somewhere not on my face, cause im pushing like 16 holes in my ears, and I don't want to look too 'unpro' or whatever. Can't get the navel done yet, oh hell I don't know.

2004-04-07T10:29:00.000-04:00

Okay, so I hope I have this blog thing right, anyway. Yesterday, had a long day, went to the other side of the state to set up a remote location. That went pretty well, better than expected. Although, we had to wait for a 3rd party to set up the final printing specs. So, we did that and didn't get back to the office till 5 when it was time to go home:) Yes, we planned it that way. Then, I went home, went to the Dr.'s, and by that time it was like 8 pm. Ate dinner, surfed the net a bit when I got home, and went to bed.
Now I'm at work pickin up slack for the shit that didn't get done yesterday. But, its pretty quiet. Oh, I got a call from Fred! Yeah I was really excited since I didn't know if the E-mail would get to him or not. So, since I was in the car with my boss, I had to cut him short and I gave him a call later last night and he didn't anwser, so we will see how that goes. At least I have his number now and I know he got the mail.
So lets see, what the hell am I doing today? After work, nothing, I am beat and I didn't get much sleep at all, I'm running on like 4 hrs here. Oh well. Gotta do what I gotta do. I do have quite alot going on. I have to finish my irrogatories for the attorney, which will be finished tonight. Thats all for now, I may be back and post more when more comes to me.

2004-04-05T13:36:00.000-04:00

Ok, so maybe this may turn into something I can follow through with. I usually have troubles with things like this, keeping them updated, etc. But, I will give it one hell of a shot. Its Monday, and I am at work, patienly waiting for SBC to get here because there stuff sucks major ass and has been holding us up all week. We did the same thing with another ISP and everything ran fine in about 15 minutes, with SBC it has taken almost a week. Ugh.
This weekend we went to Ann Arbor for the Hashbash.This is my fifth year in a row. We had a great time, my mom and I went. Weather was nice, hardly any pigs, lots of cool people. Including Fred, from GlassDesigns which I hope he will be getting ahold of me. I want to learn how to blow glass and he has classes out of his studio. I get to leave work early today, as I have another doctor appt. Hopefully I get some stuff straight with them. Sunday, went to the mall and I got a shirt that says "If your dick was as big as your mouth, I'd be intrested". Haha I thought it was funny. Also got a new hoodie and this kick ass fiber optic plant, yes it looks just like that one plant that I love. And, on Apr. 1st thinkgeek.com was running a special. Buy $10 worth of stuff and get a shirt for free. It had binary all over the front and I converted it, it says "I shopped at thinkgeek on April fools and all I got was this lousy shirt." I also purchased a "Map of the Internet 2001" for $12.99 so I could get the shirt. I was excited can't wait to get it. Getting shit in the mail rocks unless they are bills. And, I have my eye set on a house that I want so we will see how that goes...
Man, its quiet at work on Monday's. Everyone in the office is quiet and here I am, bloggin away listening to Godsmack (Thnx Cody) and comming up with website ideas.
I want to start a new website, don't know what it will be yet, but thats what I am aiming for, in the middle of doing everything else. Thebroken is boring, and well, annoying at times. And who knows what it will be like when the new boards open. I need to come up with a design for this blog, because if I am gonna write in it, I need a little flare to inspire me to write in it. I need to brush up on my html. *Cough*Cody* Ugh, I hate coding, I know I know HTML isn't coding but I consider it coding. I will get frustrated quickly. Fucking shit doesn't work, it pisses me off :) So, then I want to break it and lets just say that isn't the best practice. I am kinda liking this blogging, maybe it will help me to vent out and release shit I just can't release in public, they put me in a padded fucking room. Well, I am sure there will be more to come as I am liking this blog. I am going to look for some web ideas...

2004-04-04T14:53:00.000-04:00

This is a test, only a test